intuitivelyapt

[O.O Spike is following them upstairs now, trying to squeeze in between Sylar and Claire.]

Gabe, I think you're scaring our guest a bit. Maybe we could all have a sit down.

[Sylar doesn't know what to be offended by most, because ... there's a lot to be offended by here. Like Spike trying to ruin his lovefest with Claire. And calling him Gabe. But since he knows enough to know Spike won't go anywhere now that he's decided to ~involve himself~, he snatches Miss Moppet away from Claire before removing himself from her completely.]

Fine. Let's sit down. We can talk about the kind of pie we're going to make.

[ She'll settle on having Miss Moppet snatched away and throw the cat under the bus in order to hide behind Spike a little -- okay, she'd probably prefer to word it like putting Spike strategically between her and Sylar, but whatever. It's hiding. ]

You mean the one that I'm going to bake broken glass into and shove down your throat? [ She begins to creep backwards down the stairs. ] We're not going to sit anywhere, I'm getting out of here.

[ Then she turns her gaze up a little pathetically to Spike, looking for sympathy. ] He just came to my house and dragged me here and I don't even know how he got there! I just wanna go home.

[Spike checks his pockets for his lighter and only finds his Zippo. Rolling his eyes and holding out a hand to Sylar, he says,] Give it back, you prat.

[ And now she's scandalized at Spike. } He got it from you? He could have used it to go ... to go ... I don't know, kill someone?

He doesn't kill people anymore. And he stole it from me! It's not like I gave it to him with a blueprint to go kidnap you.

I'm going to be in the kitchen. [He calls to either of them like they even give a shit about his life. Him and Miss Moppet will just sit at the table and have deep conversations about life. She's the only one who understands him 8( ]

It's Sylar! Blueprints to kidnap me kind of come with the packaging! Maybe you should keep your weird magic worldhopping equipment in a safer place with him as a roommate! [ Yeah, she's pointedly ignoring his tantrum. ]

It was in my pocket, he must have lifted it with his telekinesis when I was watching my stories. We'll get it back, alright? I wouldn't let him hurt you.

I'M NOT GOING TO HURT HER!

Right, right, you're impotent now, and you like puppies and bunnies. I keep forgetting. [ She rolls her eyes and heads down the stairs the rest of the way, leaning in the doorway of the kitchen and pointedly not actually walking in. She looks back at Spike. ]

You should start Big Brother-ing his text messages. He threatened to go all BTK on me, I swear. Minus the K. Because I guess that's the consolation prize for not being able to pull the trigger -- get creepier and more creative. He's saying he won't hurt me now, but you can't trust him.

[Spike mulls that over. He remembered when he didn't have to weigh the options of saving the girl. He just did it and damn the consequences. But this was Sylar, one of his closest friends. He wouldn't hurt Claire, would he? Not now.

He follows Claire closely, starting to work out a plan for getting his lighter back.]

I know you won't, mate. Just wanna make cupcakes with the bit here, don't you?

[He tries to hide his anger in by letting Miss Moppet scamper around the table and playing with her.]

That's what I've been saying the whole time.

[ And now she's just looking at them like they're mentally deranged. Which ... they are. ]

Okay, wait. Let me get this straight. You kidnapped me so I'd cook for you?